Thursday, January 27, 2011

New years resolutions

Due to popular demand...I present for your viewing pleasure...my new years resolutions.

(Note: due to various legislation, treaties, injunctions and supreme court precedent I cannot name all of resolutions.)

1. Be even more awesome. I know that you are saying to yourself "impossible" but I know that with your thoughts and prays I can become even more awesome....I wonder if to reach optimal awesomeness, will I have to stop being friends with Jeremy? Probably...but that's a post for another day.

2. To not run a marathon. I think with some planning, a large amount of mountain dew and halo I should be able accomplish this one.

3. This year I will turn 29 since it is my last full year in my 20's, I think that it is my moral obligation to buy an unseemly amount of fireworks in Wyoming, and launch them there so as to not break any state laws. (right here is were you imagine a winking emoticon.)

4. I am hoping this year to pull a legendary April Fools joke. Be prepared any of you could be my victim...Bwahahahaha

5. Say "that's what she said" more.

6. Go hang gliding

7. Compete in an eating competition.

8. Do a blog post about how dissapointed I am that Anne Hathaway is going to be Catwoman in the next Batman movie. LAME!

9. Hike Mt. Timp. That snobby mountain has been looking down on me for almost three decades and it's time I put it in it's place. It has only been spared because of my general distain of physical activity. But enough is enough watch your back Timp!

10. Lead my Laser tag team to Nationals. Just messing I don't have a lasertag team.

11. Start a laser tag team.

12. Get punched in the face. I have only been punched in the face a few times but they were all in the span of a few minutes...and therefore my recollection is a little blurry and I have forgotten what that passage in to manhood felt like.

13. Ride in a hot air balloon.

14. Organize a massive water fight.

15. Take a ride in one of those Human hamster balls. Note to self possible birthday party.

16. Rent a Wave Runner.

17. Redeem myself at dodge ball...those cheating jerks from Keybank won't know what hit them...oh wait yes they will a dodge ball. I should probably get my lovable band of rejects together and start practicing.

18. Only have 18 new years resolutions! Sweet!

Honorable mentions.

Quote anchor man more. I decided that I already quote that sufficiently.

Watch more mash ups on youtube. I decided that while fun, they really don't help me become more awesome.


Well fellow adventurers, 2011 is going to be freaking epic. I hope that you all manage to come out with me and cross some items off my list. As soon as the weather warms up it is going to be open season on list items.
Take Luck.

Your Guide For Life,
-Ryan

P.S. 2011 is off to an epic start with 2 halo nights under my belt already.

Before the List