Just in case you were curious what happens when Danyell and I stay up past out bedtime.
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
R.I.P SUMMER : (
With this blog post Summer 2011 is officially over. This summer was pretty amazing and I did a lot of awesome stuff that I didn’t blog about because I have a irrational fear of keyboards. Since there were like 100 blog posts I was going to write I am just combining them into one epic blog post, tentatively titled Blog post; The first avenger.
Here it goes.
I led my Dream Dinner Champion team of Champions to victory in one out of five dodge ball games and only swore once. We did however win the “rock climbing wall of glory”. Thanks mostly to my fearless leadership and various motivational chants.
I managed to cross an item from my list when I rented a human hamster ball… If you missed that I hope that you cry yourself to sleep tonight, then when you are all cried out you can go to the following link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fUPsd9u7Yg (you have to copy and paste it because I suck at this)
to get a feel of what it was like inside my dome of awesomeness. (Later that night, I accidentally declared war on two of my neighbors when my aerial firework tipped over and projected flaming balls of awesome at their perspective houses.)
Danyell and I went on a cruise and you can watch the following (upside down) movie above this post to see what it would be like to go on vacation with us…If you guessed that it would be awesome you would be correct.
I got to spend a night in JFK airport which was pretty terrible but I managed to read like 3 books while there. Including World War Z, pretty much guaranteeing that I will survive the inevitable Zombie apocalypse.
I gave the speech from Independence day which was pretty awesome and I also managed to get the nick name Horatio too… Which I am a little conflicted about.
A brief recap incase I forgot stuff;
Sang karaoke, drove a jeep wrangler for the first time, swam in the Atlantic ocean, slept in an airport, got laid off, got a new job, rode four wheelers, went kayaking, bought a jeep, drove a Harley, had an ice cream snicker bar for the first time ever (I used to think that I would need a jet pack to find everlasting peace and eternal happiness but I am pretty sure that ice cream snickers can also do that.) I also found out that they still make scented markers and peach scented marker is the greatest smell in the entire world…the entire world.
As this summer closes I want to express gratitude for all my friends and cohorts who allowed me to stay awesome for yet another summer. A very special thank you to Nate and Megan Walters, without whom I would have gone an entire summer without ever going on a rope swing and thus causing me to be tormented by guilt for the rest of my life.
As a note I may have to officially extend summer to the 16th of September because I will be in the greatest dodgeball game the universe has ever seen. If you can’t make it to Thanksgiving point to watch me throw dodgeballs while wearing daisy dukes have no fear I will recap it for you.
As Summer comes to a close I would like to remind everybody that Halloween is rapidly approaching. Halloween was recently declared (by me) as the second most awesome holiday. The first is the Fourth of July for obvious reasons. I want to make sure that everyone remembers to keep the spirit of Halloween with them remember that Halloween is about more than just candy it is also about juvenile pranks and singing karaoke with me and Danyell.
In case you missed it this picture pretty much sums up my summer.
Your Guide For Life,
-Ryan
Here it goes.
I led my Dream Dinner Champion team of Champions to victory in one out of five dodge ball games and only swore once. We did however win the “rock climbing wall of glory”. Thanks mostly to my fearless leadership and various motivational chants.
I managed to cross an item from my list when I rented a human hamster ball… If you missed that I hope that you cry yourself to sleep tonight, then when you are all cried out you can go to the following link http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5fUPsd9u7Yg (you have to copy and paste it because I suck at this)
to get a feel of what it was like inside my dome of awesomeness. (Later that night, I accidentally declared war on two of my neighbors when my aerial firework tipped over and projected flaming balls of awesome at their perspective houses.)
Danyell and I went on a cruise and you can watch the following (upside down) movie above this post to see what it would be like to go on vacation with us…If you guessed that it would be awesome you would be correct.
I got to spend a night in JFK airport which was pretty terrible but I managed to read like 3 books while there. Including World War Z, pretty much guaranteeing that I will survive the inevitable Zombie apocalypse.
I gave the speech from Independence day which was pretty awesome and I also managed to get the nick name Horatio too… Which I am a little conflicted about.
A brief recap incase I forgot stuff;
Sang karaoke, drove a jeep wrangler for the first time, swam in the Atlantic ocean, slept in an airport, got laid off, got a new job, rode four wheelers, went kayaking, bought a jeep, drove a Harley, had an ice cream snicker bar for the first time ever (I used to think that I would need a jet pack to find everlasting peace and eternal happiness but I am pretty sure that ice cream snickers can also do that.) I also found out that they still make scented markers and peach scented marker is the greatest smell in the entire world…the entire world.
As this summer closes I want to express gratitude for all my friends and cohorts who allowed me to stay awesome for yet another summer. A very special thank you to Nate and Megan Walters, without whom I would have gone an entire summer without ever going on a rope swing and thus causing me to be tormented by guilt for the rest of my life.
As a note I may have to officially extend summer to the 16th of September because I will be in the greatest dodgeball game the universe has ever seen. If you can’t make it to Thanksgiving point to watch me throw dodgeballs while wearing daisy dukes have no fear I will recap it for you.
As Summer comes to a close I would like to remind everybody that Halloween is rapidly approaching. Halloween was recently declared (by me) as the second most awesome holiday. The first is the Fourth of July for obvious reasons. I want to make sure that everyone remembers to keep the spirit of Halloween with them remember that Halloween is about more than just candy it is also about juvenile pranks and singing karaoke with me and Danyell.
In case you missed it this picture pretty much sums up my summer.
Your Guide For Life,
-Ryan
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Redemption has a Name...
And that name is R.Y.A.N!
Many of you are unaware of just how bad I failed my dodge ball team last year. It wasn't all my fault as the A-holes on the Keybank team were a bunch of dirty, filthy, cheaters whose flagrant disregard for the rules have ensured I will never trust them with my money. But that is a whole other story.
Besides dirty, dirty cheaters there are mainly 4 reasons why things didn't work out for us.
1. I didn't wear a Tom Landry hat to properly motivate my team.
2. I assumed that because I am so awesome and have seen the movie "Dodgeball" like 100 times I would naturally lead my team to victory.
3. I wasn't wearing enough sweat bands.
4. I didn't turn my name into an acronym of my strategy.
R-Remember the A.L.A.M.O (see below)
Y-Yes, I will destroy all opponents who dare oppose me.
A-Awesome will always triumph (except for last year, which was the exception that proves the rule)
N-Never is not enough...
A-Avoid getting hit by the ball.
L-Look where you are throwing.
A-Always eat a good breakfast.
M-Move out of the way of the ball.
O-Only one team can win.
Once plan R.Y.A.N has been implemented I should be a lethal dodgeball force.
The project will involve hours of dodging and catching drills designed by me for optimal dodgeball performance...
I just realized that I don't have very much time before I will meet my opponents in ball to ball combat, which means I won't have time to implement project R.Y.A.N, which means we are probably going to loose again. (sigh... Ef)
For some people going into something they know will end in a humiliating defeat may cause them to reassess their course of action. Luckily, I am not one of those people. Even though I am 90% certain my participation in this dodgeball game will end with my humiliation, I cannot wait to do it because as Dr. Seuss in his infinite wisdom has said "these things are fun and fun is good". So I am going to choose fun over dignity and always will.
Your Guide for Life,
-Ryan
Many of you are unaware of just how bad I failed my dodge ball team last year. It wasn't all my fault as the A-holes on the Keybank team were a bunch of dirty, filthy, cheaters whose flagrant disregard for the rules have ensured I will never trust them with my money. But that is a whole other story.
Besides dirty, dirty cheaters there are mainly 4 reasons why things didn't work out for us.
1. I didn't wear a Tom Landry hat to properly motivate my team.
2. I assumed that because I am so awesome and have seen the movie "Dodgeball" like 100 times I would naturally lead my team to victory.
3. I wasn't wearing enough sweat bands.
4. I didn't turn my name into an acronym of my strategy.
R-Remember the A.L.A.M.O (see below)
Y-Yes, I will destroy all opponents who dare oppose me.
A-Awesome will always triumph (except for last year, which was the exception that proves the rule)
N-Never is not enough...
A-Avoid getting hit by the ball.
L-Look where you are throwing.
A-Always eat a good breakfast.
M-Move out of the way of the ball.
O-Only one team can win.
Once plan R.Y.A.N has been implemented I should be a lethal dodgeball force.
The project will involve hours of dodging and catching drills designed by me for optimal dodgeball performance...
I just realized that I don't have very much time before I will meet my opponents in ball to ball combat, which means I won't have time to implement project R.Y.A.N, which means we are probably going to loose again. (sigh... Ef)
For some people going into something they know will end in a humiliating defeat may cause them to reassess their course of action. Luckily, I am not one of those people. Even though I am 90% certain my participation in this dodgeball game will end with my humiliation, I cannot wait to do it because as Dr. Seuss in his infinite wisdom has said "these things are fun and fun is good". So I am going to choose fun over dignity and always will.
Your Guide for Life,
-Ryan
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